If you are giving or doing too much for your partner in your relationship, you will end up being depleted of your energy, frustrated, not feeling appreciated and that your needs are not important. You have probably learned during your childhood that in order to be loved, you need to give and do for others. This is bringing you into a masculine energy which is focused on doing, planning, giving and in the long run will bring an imbalance into your relationship. In hoping that the more you give to your partner the more he will be willing to take care of you, you will lose focus on yourself and if your partner doesn’t do anything for you, you will end up tired, depleted, unseen and unappreciated. You need to learn how to get back into your feminine energy by bringing back your focus on you. If you feel frustrated because no one is taking care of your needs, you need to take care of yourself. The less you concentrate on your partner, the more energy you will have to give to yourself and your own needs. Ask yourself: what do I need? To enjoy a nice bubbly and relaxing bath? To schedule a nice massage? To buy myself flowers to enjoy their beauty? To take a nap and rest? To read a nice book? To daydream and envision how your life could be better? To watch a romantic movie while you sip on a warming herbal tea? The feminine energy is all about relaxing, dreaming, imagining, taking care of yourself, listening to your intuition, enjoying life and being in the present moment!
If you start to concentrate on yourself more and do less for your partner, he might react in a strange way. He might punish you by ignoring you and pout, depriving you from his attention, affection and love in order to show the fact that he is not happy with your new behavior towards him. This might trigger you into the fear of being abandoned or rejected by him and you could risk going back to your old pattern of being in your masculine energy. You could even begin being anxious and fearful of losing him. You have to learn to deal with your anxiety in order to not give in. Get back your confidence by repeating positive affirmations like: I deserve to be loved for whom I am; I am lovable; My needs are important; I deserve the best in life; I am important and valuable. The more you repeat these powerful affirmations, the less you will stress when your partner is reacting to your new feminine ways which is normal because he got used to a completely different behavior and now you are changing the rules.
Try to have an open discussion with him explaining to him that you need to come back into your feminine energy and take care of you because you are exhausted or whatever your truth is. Just speak from a personal perspective without being accusatory or putting the fault on him. Give him the space to express himself and share your feelings and needs. This conversation, if well done, will bring you closer and he will end up having more respect for you because you are giving yourself the importance and respect that you deserve. Unless he is a toxic partner and he wants you go keep giving to him even if it’s making you unhappy and exhausted.
I hope this brings you more awareness about your past or future relationships. If you are interested in working with me, let’s schedule a discovery call to see if we can work together at helping you become the Queen that you deserve to be in order to attract your King (aka soulmate).