How to build emotional intimacy with your soulmate or future right partner

1. Express your emotions to your partner

If something bothers you and it’s hard for you to verbalize it, sit down with yourself and try to connect with your feelings. Jot down your feelings in a note book and when you get clear about what really bothers you, let your partner know that you would like to talk with him. Try to express yourself in a responsible way, without putting the guilt on him or making him feel responsible for your emotional built-up. Tell him clearly what you want and just express the fact that you want to be heard. Let him know that whatever his answer is, you will accept it. This way, he will feel free to give you a positive or negative answer without feeling pressured. Sometimes he will say yes and sometimes he will say no and he has the right to give you an honest answer, but don’t forget that in general, men want to please you and make you happy. Unless he is toxic, and this is a completely another story! The fact that you express yourself but you respect his position, will be beneficial for you and for him as well. The worst thing you can do is to hold your emotions inside, end up by having a huge emotional build-up and then starting screaming or be verbally violent towards him. I have been there myself in the past because I didn’t know how to deal with my emotions so believe me, I am not judging you! Since I have learned how to express myself, I felt so much more empowered and freer.

2. Have the courage to be vulnerable with your soulmate

Even if you fear rejection, try to show your vulnerable side and give him a chance to really know you. Do you usually have superficial conversations with him without ever going into more deep conversations about how you feel or don’t express the fact that you feel hurt or ignored? Do you tell yourself in your head that how you feel is not important? Are you afraid of being ignored by him or that he will change the subject? Did he already do that or is it just an irrational thought? Take a small chance and see how he reacts. The better he reacts and the more you will be ok with being vulnerable and as a consequence, he will also open his heart to you and tell you how he truly feels. It took me so many years to learn how to be vulnerable because in my childhood, I had learned that being sensitive was not normal or accepted. This made me to completely shut off from my emotions and don’t express how I truly felt.

3. Don’t confuse sexual intimacy with emotional intimacy

If you have never experienced emotional intimacy in your childhood, there is a high risk that you confuse sexual intimacy with emotional intimacy in your current love relationship. You will even want to have sexual intercourse to feel closer to your partner not knowing that real emotional intimacy comes from sharing your feelings, needs and opening your heart. In order to really connect with your soulmate, try instead to get closer to his heart and your sexual life will get even better.

4. Express your intense emotions first

Do you have the pattern of manifesting romantic partners that are not emotionally available? They run away as soon as you get upset and you have anger or resentment build-up? Those emotionally unavailable men will run away because they can’t take your intense emotions and don’t want to feel that it’s all their fault and responsibility. The way you can deal with this situation, is to express your anger or resentment by doing different things like: hit a pillow, take a tennis racket and hit your bed with it (it worked for me!). Anything that lets you express your intense emotional build-up but that doesn’t hurt anyone is perfect for you! Don’t be ashamed by how you feel. Us, human beings were created to have feelings so accept yourself with everything that you feel. As soon as you feel relieved, talk to your partner in a calm and responsible way and maybe this time around, he will be available to listen to you and not leave you by yourself.

If you have any questions, let me know below in the comments box. 


Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Why you don’t feel loved – I explain it here:

No matter what someone does, if you have a deep-rooted limiting belief that you don’t deserve love, you will always struggle with feeling loved. You will look for reassurance outside of yourself and feel that nothing the person says or does reassures you long term. You will try to sabotage the relationship because deep down you need to be consistent with your external reality. If you don’t believe that you deserve love and your partner shows you affection and love, there will be a conflict within you. This will create tension and make you do things that sabotage the relationship like having doubts, pushing the person to do more or show you more love, provoke a fight, being jealous, etc.
You need to work on the subconscious belief that you don’t deserve love in order to replace it with the belief that YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED. When you will do that, you will start feeling loved and the feeling will stay without you having to search for proof or reassurance. By doing that, you will find peace within yourself and remove all the pressure you put on your partner. Therefore, your relationship will get better and if you are single, you will be less dependent on finding love outside of yourself and instead be motivated to love yourself more which I’m turn will attract your right partner.
Or maybe that you don’t you love yourself? I explain it right here:
One of the main reasons you don’t love yourself is because you didn’t learn to love yourself. If you were mistreated in your childhood, heavily critiqued or compared, if you have experienced verbal or physical abuse, if you were bullied, not respected or controlled or dominated, you didn’t have a healthy environment in which you could develop self-love.
A child will not put the fault on his parents if he is abused (because a child needs to feel safe) but instead, will put the fault on himself and will start making up beliefs about himself like: I am a bad kid; I don’t deserve to be loved; I am not enough; I don’t deserve to be happy; my needs are not important; etc.
Unfortunately, as we are growing up, we bring these negative beliefs and self-worth issues into our adulthood without realising that we are shooting ourself in the foot. We forget that we are not children anymore and that we have power over our life. So we keep dragging these limiting beliefs like a bag of garbage that we refuse to throw out.
Today, you don’t depend on anyone anymore, you can start believing that you are lovable and worthy, that you are a good person and that you are enough!
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Why you don’t accept yourself fully – I explain it here :

If you have trouble accepting yourself, this can stem from your childhood. If you didn’t feel accepted as you were by your parents or caretakers you will have trouble accepting yourself later in life. You have internalized those negative voices in your head and your small loving inner voice is buried somewhere beneath all this noise: “You aren’t good enough”; “Look how better she is than you!; “You are so dumb”; “You cry too much; “You are too this or too that”; “Don’t do this, don’t be like that”. Being constantly critiqued, diminished, compared, laughed at, humiliated or judged will make you think that you are not ok as you are, that you should be something else, that you have to be like other people that you perceive as being better than you, that you are damaged or weird, that what you are is not acceptable or ok, that you have to hide what makes you unique and original. The downside of that is that you hide what makes you so unique and beautiful and you learn to be a white sheep surrounded by other white sheep instead of being a purple sheep that is proud to be different. You can also be a magnificent peacock, if you ask me! Be what ever your soul wants you to be! 
Later in life, you don’t get to know and discover whom you truly are and accept yourself fully with all your facets whatever they are because you are either ashamed or scared to show them. You have to realize first that you don’t have to be anything than yourself since there never was, there is not and there will never be someone exactly like you. It is your uniqueness that makes you valuable, magical and special! You have to learn to embrace your quirks, perceived defaults and limits as well as your talents, gifts and difference. It’s this potent potion of abilities, gifts, quirks and  personality that make you stand out! that  Learn to observe those negative voices in your head and to replace them with a kind and accepting voice that ignores that poisonous chattering in your head and instead has a loving and encouraging tone. You don’t have to be perfect, neither better than someone else, neither something else that you already are, you have to be your best version and strive to be better each day. You unique point of comparison should be the yesterday version of yourself.
Look at whom you admire and know that you have those same qualities and gifts as them or you can develop them with time. If not, you would not be able to recognize those same characteristics in them. You have to recuperate those facets of yourself that you have learned to hide in order to be accepted, valued, recognized or loved by others. Those facets of yourself are waiting for your permission to show themselves and help you become your best version!
The more you learn to accept yourself as you are and the less importance you will give others about what they think of you. You also have to accept that it’s ok to not be fully accepted by others, it’s ok to not be loved by everyone, it’s ok to stand out and be weird in other people’s eyes! You are the only one that has the responsibility to love and accept yourself fully. You are God’s divine creation (or however you call the creator of the universe) and that makes you special, unique and precious! Never forget that!
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

How not to be manipulated by a man

Here are three tips on how to prevent being manipulated by a man:
1. He must be consistent
Don’t take into consideration a man’s words but instead look at the consistency of his actions towards you. Is he consistent in giving you attention and time? Is he consistent in calling or texting you? Is he consistent in making you his priority? Is his consistent in making you feel important and valuable?
If he’s only giving you attention when he wants something from you, don’t take him seriously. You deserve much better than someone whom is wishy washy. A man that is consistent for a long period of time, shows that he is serious about the relationships he has with you.
2. His words are matching his actions
Whatever he promises to you, he honors it most of the time. He has the right to change his mind but if he’s only words and no actions, be aware. Don’t be fooled by beautiful words if his actions say otherwise. Him honoring his promises to you shows that you are important and valuable to him.
3. Men can be wonderful until….
…they get what they want. If he’s charming, loving and caters to your needs and after you give in with sex for example he changes radically, then you fell into his trap. Men have this talent of manipulating you into believing that they are so good to you and can easily wear a mask to make you believe it. As soon as they get what they want, they remove their mask without any shame and you get to see their true nature. How to not fall into that trap? Take your time to get to know him well and don’t give him sex until you both have feelings for each other and you feel ready. By taking your time to really know him, establishing a heart to heart connection and being vulnerable with each other, he will have the time to open his heart and fall in love with you or to leave if he’s not interested in getting to know you other than physically.
I hope that those tips bring you more awareness into the psychology of how man can be and you avoid getting into the trap of being manipulated by a man next time you are in a similar situation.

How to find self-esteem after a break-up

If you lost your self-esteem after a difficult break-up, there are a few ways you can reclaim your self-esteem. I will share 4 tips in this article:
1. Remind yourself that you are God’s creation
You are God’s (or whatever name you give to the creator of the universe) creation so that means you are special. There never was, there is not and there will never be someone exactly like you. You are unique and nobody can replace you, therefore you must value yourself accordingly. One day you will find your soulmate and the fact that you are single and heartbroken today doesn’t diminish your value.
2. Remind yourself that you are limitless
There is nothing that you can not create if you have a dream and the talent for it. No matter how you feel right now: lonely, sad or angry, not worthy or not loved, tell yourself that this is temporary. You are not defined by a man’s love towards you. You are defined by the beauty that resides within you and by the power of the love that you hold into your heart. Take your power back by concentrating on your dreams and objectives and give yourself what you want. Practice self-love during this solitary period and do things that bring you bliss.
3. Take pride in sharing whom you really are
This is the time to get to know yourself more. What have you left on the side that you would like to reintroduce into your life now there is space for it? What activities or passions are waiting for you to reintroduce into your life? What do you want to create? What do you want to share with the world? You have unique gifts that can benefit the world and you could start sharing these with the ones that would love to benefit from them!
4. Take your time to digest your pain
If you have difficult emotions that you need to process like anger or sadness, take your time to get through them. The sooner you express them, the shorter the period of mourning the relationship will be. You can write in a journal or talk to someone that you can trust. You can learn from this relationship what you no longer want in a relationship and what lessons you have learned. If this relationship didn’t work out, is because someone else is better for you. It is ok to think about memories or fall into the trap of seeing your ex or wanting to go back to him, nobody is perfect. The important thing is to decide one day that you deserve better and that going back to something that will not work out, is turning in circles and not giving yourself the space to heal.
I hope that these tips shed more light on this topic and until next time, much love.
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Why do you keep going back to your ex? I explain it right here:

Are you one of those women that keeps going back to her ex? You would like to stop doing it but you can’t stop going back?
Here are 4 reasons that could explain why you keep falling into the same trap:
1. You don’t want to deal with difficult emotions
You would rather think about him or try to contact him rather to sit down and feel your emotions. You are afraid that some painful emotions would come up and that you would not be able to process them. I recommend that when you feel that painful emotions rising up, that you write in a journal whatever you feel like writing without judging what you jot down. Write down anything that comes up: anger, sadness, resentment, jealousy; just give yourself the gift of liberating yourself of anything that keeps you stuck. You will feel much better afterwards and you will be less tempted to contact your ex or to give in to his flirting.
2. You are not ready to face your abandonment wound
You keep hanging on for dear life to him because you are avoiding feeling abandoned or rejected. The little girl in you is hurt and your current separation brings up the unresolved emotions of that little girl in you that didn’t have the occasion to express herself and to have the safe space to do so in order to process whatever feelings she might have. Today, you can take that little girl in you by the hand and listen to her. What does she want to tell you? What emotions does she want to express: sadness, anger, feelings of being abandoned or rejected, feeling unworthy of love, not good enough, not perfect, not lovable? Become the mother that you never had by giving yourself the love and attention that you are missing.
3. You hope that this time around he will change
He keeps making promises and he is so convincing! You say to yourself that this time around he will keep his promises and that he really understands that you are serious this time. The truth is that he will most probably change in his next relationship and not with you. Why? Because as long as you keep coming back to him you are sending him the same message over and over, which is: keep doing what you are doing because I will keep coming back. You will have to leave him for good in order for him to really understand the lesson and apply it in his next relationship.
4. You are not ready to face the truth
Cutting the relationship for good is making you scared because that would make you come to some irrational and wrong conclusions:
· that there will not be another man that will love you;
· that you are not worthy of love;
· that you will end up alone and lonely;
· that you can’t deal with the pain of losing him for good;
· that you are doing a mistake because he is the one;
· that you should accept him as he is because afterall, he is not so bad.
These are limiting beliefs that keep you stuck in place and if you don’t take the time to demystify and transform them, you will lose precious time by staying stuck and not having the joy of experiencing something much better. There is someone out there for you who will treat you with the love, respect and attention that you truly deserve but because you are not willing to let go of these beliefs, you will not get to experience.
I hope that these 4 points bring you more awareness into why you keep going back to your ex and that you find a way out of this toxic pattern in order to find the true and bounty love that you deserve!
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Why you attract narcissistic partners – I explain it right here:

If you had parents or caretakers that lacked empathy or didn’t put your needs first as a child, you learned that your emotional needs weren’t important and that you were neither important nor valued. You learned to shut yourself off in order to not feel anymore because there was no empathy available for you and you learned to put other people’s needs first in order to feel loved, valued, recognized and important.
If you had to grow up very fast because you had to take care of either one of your parents or of your siblings (either emotionally or physically), you didn’t get to experience a nurturing and loving relationship by being taken care of or that relationship was cut very short. As a consequence, you didn’t learn to put yourself first and to take care of your needs because someone else was relying on you for their survival.
By adopting these patterns of survival yourself, later on, as an adult, you will attract partners that most often put their needs first and that lack empathy towards you. You will find that normal because this is the way that you were raised and you will not see the red flags at first and you might even think that it’s your fault because in some way you are not lovable, nor important nor valuable.
It is important to take a step back and ask yourself the following questions:
• Is it time for me to be the most important person in my life?
• Am I tired of always feeling that my emotions are not important?
• Am I tired of looking for validation outside of myself?
• Don’t I deserve better that being treated as not important?
• Do I deserve to be loved and to love myself?
• Do I deserve someone that gives importance to my needs?
• Do I deserve someone whom is emotionally available and to whom I can talk to?
If your answer to most of the above questions is yes, then you are ready to give yourself the importance and value that you deserve by asking for what you deserve and if your partner can not give you that maybe you are ready to heal yourself and attract your true love soulmate!
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Don’t search for your soulmate before you do this

Are you planning to go on a dating site but you have a past of attracting the wrong partners? Then stop. This is not the right time to look for a partner. If you are still dealing with self-love, self-esteem issues or self-respect issues, this is the worst mistake you could do if you want to find the right partner!
Let me explain why. The fact that you have still deep healing to do is a major sign that you have negative limiting beliefs about yourself. Like: I don’t deserve to be loved; In order to be valued, I have to do and to give to others; In order to be loved, I have to let others step on my boundaries; I am not enough; I have little value; I am not important; my needs are not important, etc.
You want to attract your true love soulmate right? Then you need to know how manifestation works. We attract exactly what we are and think that we are. If we think bad thoughts about ourselves, we will attract men that will show, as a mirror, that what we believe about ourselves is true. So to make it simple for you: if you hold a belief that you are not important, you will attract a partner that will treat you in a way that you will make you feel not important. If you believe that you are unworthy of love, you will be treated in a way that makes you feel unloved or on the contrary, nothing will be enough for you to feel loved because deep inside of yourself, you don’t believe that you deserve to be loved. Therefore, it is crucial that you work on your mindset before any tentative of finding your soulmate to put all the chances of success on your side and not waste any more time.
Also, if you still have emotional wounds that haven’t been healed, they will be brought up in the relationship because there is nothing better than a romantic partner to wake in us what needs to come to the surface and be healed. They will trigger us exactly where we need to be triggered, in order for the junk to come to the surface and be brought to the light. If we don’t know how to release our pain in a healthy way, we will adopt unhealthy patterns in order to not feel our pain and this will create discord in our relationship. If you take the time to work on your communication skills and how to transform your emotional wounds, you will have better chances at succeeding.
Working on yourself it’s like putting together a beautiful fruit tart. If the basis is not solid and can’t hold the fruit together along with the custard, nothing will stay put and it will eventually come apart. Therefore, we need to make sure the basis of the relationship with ourself is solid before we try to build a relationship with someone else.
If we want to find a partner that makes us feel loved, cherished, valued, nourished and respected, we need to deeply believe that we are worthy of all these things. If not, we will attract exactly our mirror and then we will have to start again and again, losing precious years because we are not willing to stop and take a long look at ourself. If you have suffered from emotional or physical abuse or neglect in your past, it is vital that you work on yourself and the sooner you do it, the better you will get at attracting the right partner for you.
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

The secret to a healthy self-esteem in order to attract your Soulmate

The majority of us have been brought up to believe that self-esteem should come from how much we accomplish in life, what we do for others, how we show up in the world or how we are better than others. This is straight @#$….it and it made us become something that we are not. We have ended up wearing a mask, suffering from comparison, having trouble saying no or trying to impress others.
There is a much simpler definition to self-esteem. Self-esteem should be based on the capacity to recognize ourselves as a unique and beautiful creation of God (Creator of the Universe). Every woman is God’s creation, therefore, every woman should have self-esteem for herself, period.
If you catch yourself comparing yourself to other women, know that you will always end up losing, since you would have to be the best in the world at something in order to not lose. By simply accepting yourself as you are and choosing to see your qualities and gifts as enough, you will become more solid and confident. Try to be a better version that yesterday and one day you will be your best version!
If you have trouble saying no to people by fear of them disapproving of you or losing the value in their eyes, remember that no one’s opinion is more important than yours. When you fall into the trap of giving your power away by giving more importance to the opinion of others, you are self-abandoning. The next time if feel like saying “no” to someone instead of an﮴”yes”, remember that you don’t owe nothing to anyone and you are free of choosing yourself. If you lose their friendship or admiration, it means that there was nothing solid to begin with in the beginning. By doing so, you will gain more self-respect and self-esteem.
If you hide facets of yourself in order to be something that you think it’s more valuable than what you already are, it is time for you to reclaim your true self. All the facets of your inner diamond are precious and you should show them to the world, because they make you the unique person that you are. A simple way of finding out which parts of yourself are hidden, it’s to be aware of what qualities you admire in others or you are envious of. Those qualities are already in you and are just waiting to be claimed by you in order to show themselves.
If you are killing yourself at work in order to prove your value, know that you are exhausting yourself in vain. You are already valuable and enough. You don’t need to be in burnout or almost there, to feel valuable or that you are worth something. This is all wrong! You got it all wrong and it’s not your fault! It’s just the way you were brought up and it’s time now for you to release all the pressure you are putting on yourself (I already did this in the past and I had my lesson! I almost touched burnout when I realized that I was valuing myself from a wrong perspective!).
If you have a healthy self-esteem you won’t attract partners that take advantage of you or abuse you so it is very important to get your self-esteem back and realize that your unique blend of qualities, traits, personality and gifts make you so special!
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!

Conditional love vs. unconditional love

In all my past relationships, I had hoped that I would be loved unconditionally and yet, I wasn’t (and maybe I wasn’t loving them unconditionally either!). There were two long relationships where I wasn’t ready to have kids and my partners chose to be with someone else because of that. My dream of being loved by someone no matter if I chose to have kids or not was crushed and then I realized that they wanted to have kids more than they wanted to be with me. Is this true and unconditional love? Or is this more of a transaction: I will stay with you as long as you give me what I want?
True unconditional love shouldn’t come with rules or conditions. True, unconditional love is a desire to be with the person that you love no matter if she gives you what you want or not. We should choose to be with our partner, not because we need him but because we want to be with him. True unconditional love doesn’t take into account: status, religion, fortune, origin or gender.
But, does that mean that you have to accept anything or everything? No, absolutely not! If your partner cheats on you or abuses you, you should not accept that! Because accepting cheating or any kind of abuse would mean that you don’t love yourself. When you truly love yourself, you know what is acceptable or not, you have an inner nudge that tells you: this is acceptable and this is not! This helps you to put healthy boundaries and to respect yourself.
The more you love yourself unconditionally, the more you will be able to love others unconditionally and to know how you allow others to treat you. When you truly love yourself, you will attract your mirror, meaning your true Love Soulmate that will love you with no conditions because they will want to share their life with you not because of what you give them but because of simply whom you are and that is exempt of conditions.
Mystical Queen Goddess
Counselling therapist, spiritual guide and creator of the Transformation 360 method.
Because your Inner Queen wants you to experience abundance at all levels!