7. Conditional love vs. unconditional love

In all my past relationships, I had hoped that I would be loved unconditionally and yet, I wasn’t (and maybe I wasn’t loving them unconditionally either!). There were two long relationships where I wasn’t ready to have kids and my partners chose to be with someone else because of that. My dream of being loved by someone no matter if I chose to have kids or not was crushed and then I realized that they wanted to have kids more than they wanted to be with me. Is this true and unconditional love? Or is this more of a transaction: I will stay with you as long as you give me what I want?

True unconditional love shouldn’t come with rules or conditions. True, unconditional love is a desire to be with the person that you love no matter if she gives you what you want or not. We should choose to be with our partner, not because we need him but because we want to be with him. True unconditional love doesn’t take into account: status, religion, fortune, origin or sex.

But, does that mean that you have to accept anything or everything? No, absolutely not! If your partner cheats on you or abuses you, you should not accept that! Because accepting cheating or any kind of abuse would mean that you don’t love yourself. When you truly love yourself, you know what is acceptable or not, you have an inner nudge that tells you: this is acceptable and this is not! This helps you to put healthy boundaries and to respect yourself.

The more you love yourself unconditionally, the more you will be able to love others unconditionally and to know how you allow others to treat you. When you truly love yourself, you will attract your mirror, meaning your true Love Soulmate that will love you with no conditions because they will want to share their life with you not because of what you give them but because of simply whom you are and that is exempt of conditions.

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